Posted by: Leah | August 31, 2011

Elul Day 1. Being Happy for Who You Are.

September starts tomorrow, and over the last four years I can’t help but go back to the month of September 4 years ago. I know I have talked about it a fair bit, but every September now on I feel extremely blessed just being here.

To cut drama short: one fine day in September I found myself in Women’s College Hospital, and things were not great. I had huge kidney issues , and those were very rough three days in hospital. When I was finally allowed go home, that was the first day of Rosh Hashana, I still had this IV thing in me and had no job because I was fired. Uhuh.

So yeah, I did make it through, and whatever happened with me that September is not the focus of my reflections. What I would like to reflect on is that I have since felt extremely lucky for being allowed to hang around longer, and I decided waste no more time and remove anything that was really not my thing from my life – all these people, organisations I did not connect with went out. My life became very very empty. Then I started to work and still working on bringing more meaningful things in. This was not easy, but really the more you try to think what truly makes you happy, the better – because at some point of time you are going to have this ahha moment.

Now I don’t believe in doing things you don’t believe in. No, really. I believe a lot in hard work and sleepless nights if I need to and some sacrifices on the way but for something you are passionate about, not for something you feel you have to do because this is what people do, you know!

And with all these things I am in a much better place emotionally. Sure, I do get frustrated and upset sometimes, but whenever I feel like whining I just take myself back to that September, and then I look and think how far along I have come since.

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