Posted by: Leah | November 8, 2011

Measure of Success

A year ago or so I was surfing one of the dating sites and I looked the the profile of one guy. He mentioned that his goal was to find a beautiful woman to have successful beautiful children with. This bothered me.

I understand that probably none of us enters adulthood dreaming about finding some wife beater or unsettled person to have ugly untalented horrible kids who won’t graduate from high school. No, we all want our families and children to be successful.

However, life happens. A week ago or so I read a heartbreaking blog post of a mother whose child is unlikely to celebrate a two year birthday. This is a very intense read, I would like to warn you, but the message in it is in a way beautiful.

 http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/16/opinion/sunday/notes-from-a-dragon-mom.html?_r=3

It is that any relationship is ultimately created for unconditional love, the one where we don’t have many expectations of being proud of somebody or getting return on the investment of time, effort and money.

I always wonder whether sometimes people think that a happy taxi driver child is worse than an unhappy banker; or whether there is any point in having expectations at all.

Success as it is is so different for everybody and subjective. Pursuing it unrealistically creates more troubles and rarely gives happiness or satisfaction. What is a true measure of success is a very tough question. Perhaps it is how success makes you feel ,whether you want to compete and compare or it gives you inner peace and the ability to make right choices.

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